September 09, 2004

Now What?

There are certain things in life that make you stop and think. I'm not talking about the little moments of reflection that we all have on a daily basis, I am talking about the 'holy-shit-I-didn't-see-that-coming' moments that knock you flat on your ass and leave you sitting there with a stunned expression on your face.

Like finding out that your very Best Friend in the whole world is pregnant. Once you get over the initial shock, offer your congratulations, discuss the whole myriad of life changes this brings about, and hang up the phone... You find yourself just sitting there with that stupid look of astonishment.

Let me offer some background info for you. The Best Friend and I have known each other since the 7th grade, which means our friendship is just shy of 10 years old. (Holy crap, 10 years? Damn.) She is my one true friend, my best friend, and our friendship is the only one I've had that has withstood the tests of time, high school drama, boys and breakups. Words cannot even begin to describe how much she means to me, and how much I love her.

When she first told me she was pregnant, I didn't really know what to say. I was a bit surprised, to say the least. She's my age, 21. In fact, she is exactly 2 weeks younger than I am. I guess it's just a bit strange to realize that someone I've known for most of my life is going to go through something as dramatic/life-changing/incredible/scary/wonderful as having a child. But that's what people do. We all grow up.

Which is really what I have been thinking about lately. Despite my normally spastic and generally immature behavior, I'm an adult. I have responsibilities. I have got to figure out what the hell I am going to do with my life, and I need to prioritize my goals.

I'm having the exact same "Who am I and what am I doing?" crisis that I had a while ago. Only this time, I am looking towards to future with a sense of hope, instead of sheer and terrifying panic. Hope is a wonderful feeling.

And I'm also looking forward to meeting my Best Friend's wee little bebbe. :)